Tuesday, December 12, 2006

I've Got Two Minutes To Spare...


Okay, so, yesterday I awarded ourselves and the team 24 hours to revel in the victory of Sunday. To relive the glorious moments of our first sweep of the Choking Filly's in something like 29 years. Well, I've got two minutes to spare so sue me. Better yet, ask for your money back for the time of yours I've wasted putting this bit together. You got change for a quarter? Enjoy it, for two more minutes.

As I purused the little internet thing today I read a few things that were a bit puzzling to me, but after a smattering of reflection, I realized it was just another typical reaction from the Denver Faithless after the reality of no playoffs set in. On the normal, this would be the time that the excuses flow, but no, not this time. This time was different. It was a stretch even for the Filly's. And by stretch I mean, trying to dip your toes into the San Diego Bay while sitting on top of the Coronado Bridge. No chance.

The scenario? Apparently some were disappointed that the Chargers, with a 21 point lead, and a shade over three minutes left in the game, would opt to try to run up the score by allowing The Best Ever to break Piss Poor Alexander's one year old record. Bad sportsmanship they say. I'd link the article, but it's about 9000 word and really only 450 of them are good, well, those and a couple of cheerleader pics. I'd post the pics to but most of them are Dolphin's cheerleaders and well, what? Sorry, I ramble. My bad....

So, here's what I have to say about the ludicrousity (if that's a word, if not it should be) of what the Geldings are proposing here. Bad sportsmanship you say? Well, first, let me remind you of some facts here. And these facts are strictly for anyone who might want to defend the aforementioned position...

Fact: You, Geldings, in FACT Suck. You Suck. Deal with it. You don't worry about sportsmanship when your slopfuck offensive (really offensive) line cuts down Jamal's ankle or Igor's knee. Fuck your sportsmanship.

Fact: If your "Coach" (I lied, there's the link, cause the beginning is so glorious and is good for some laughs) is so inept that he would bench a "vet" (and I'm using that word looser than a girl I lived with in college, ask about that sometime) while the team was still in the division race**, in favor of a rookie, well, you deserve any beatdown you receive. Don't complain about it afterwords. You got treated worse than a donkey in Tijuana, deal with it.

Fact: Perhaps, if everyone involved, was more aware of the situation, with three minutes left in the fourth quarter of a monster blowout and The Best Ever on the verge of a milestone, you might have thought it wise to, I don't know, tackle him? I know that is a next to impossible task, but if Darrent Williams or whoever else wound up on his ass had actually keyed on the one guy, the ONE guy who everyone in the known universe knew was getting the ball, you wouldn't find yourself subject to a 28 point loss instead of 21. I don't know. It's just a thought. God forbid, our team does something that a "team" would do and get the league's MVP his record at the end of a blowout over a hated division rival on our homefield in front of 70,000 insane Bolt fans. Fuckass loser Geldings.

Fact: You are neutered horse people. You're Quarterback retired 8 years ago. He's gone. Put your Elway jerseys next to the semen stained picture of your Super Bowl trophies and recognize that your team is done. D-U-N, DONE. You may be on the verge of Elway 4.0. You may be on the verge of Griese 2.0. We don't know yet. Instead of pissing about it, beat us. And when you can't? Fuck you. It hasn't been this way in a very long time, maybe hasn't been this way ever. We went through the fucking Leaf "Era" eat my ass if you can't handle one fucking decisive ass whoopin'. Suck shit fuckball.



That felt good. Beating the Geldings felt good. Pummeling them felt good. And hearing them bitch like John Kerry felt even better. "It's not fair, it's not fair, waaaahhhhh, waaahhhh, waahhhh (tears)." You all should feel worse than "Brittany Lohilton's" vagina does in panties about yourselves. Good luck with the rest of the decade...

Oh, one more time...



Go Bolts!!

2 comments:

CJ said...

*** the division race was essentially over anyway but according to the "standings" they were still in it at the time. Forgot to put that in there, sue me.

Maximum Colossus said...

I find it funny that I'm hearing these comments regarding a game against the Mike Shanahan led Shit Ponies. Shanahan's never met a lead he liked enough not to run it up.

Also, we were trying to run clock. Sorry you couldn't stop our run game Denver. Turner is out, so let's keep TBE in there. Why not give him a shot at the record? Are we suppoesd to pass to eat clock?

Sweep them once in, what, twenty five years and this is the crybaby bullshit we have to hear? Lay the blame squarely where it belongs, Pony "Faithful". On your shitbag caoch who cares more about saving face than making the playoffs. "Waah, if Jake Plummer didn't suck so bad, we'd have won the last three Superbowls. But no, I had to start Cutler. I taught John Elway how to win a Superbowl. Plummer is unteachable. So was Griese. Cutler probably will be too. Today's players just don't respect genius anymore!"