So it was a bit of a lot of different factors that made the difference on that fine October Sunday morning. Little did I know that the “Hoss” wouldn’t be the major factor in the albeit assured and predicted victory you heard here first last week. “Hoss” was in fact good enough for a handful of yards and a nice six point play that distanced the Bolts from the Kitty Kats and almost made a fan feel secure. Almost.
Big time points for the many times mentioned and soon to be a Bolt favorite, Mr. Gates who is consistently finding that conveniently generated yet still semi annoying yellow first down stripe. Congrats to my colleague for aptly recognizing The Antonio’s nose for smelling first down yardage. Version 2.0 launched without a hitch as Keenan McCardell went for five catches for some significant yardage, making The Skipper’s options much more deep and allowing his throws to be true. What? Who said that? Dammit. I hate eating my damned words, but in this case I am all for it. Chocolate covered turds for me to feast on. If Skip keeps this up, that whole “for now” suffix to his nickname is going to vanish like the can of a Beverly Hills Soccer Mom after a trip to the lipo clinic.
Security and celebration finally came on the behalf of one Jesse Chatman, who is a gracious spot filler in terms of sore groins. While Ladanian is still battling the pulling of his groin weekly, Jesse is getting some carries and making the most of them, rushing for big yards and bigger touchdowns, putting this squad in contention. I did do some laps last Sunday, just polling some of the fans of the first place Ponies to see if they could in fact hear the sounds of the Bolts footsteps creeping up behind them. All indications were that no, they couldn’t hear our mediocre team and chose to keep their focus not on their rear view mirrors, but on their own Cat Fight on Monday Night. Well Pony fans, I am here to say that after last night’s performance on the banks of the Ohio, you had better take a peek. We are right there behind you and we are down for some Pony roping and ass branding Charger style. If not for a terrible second half against the Falcs last week, you would be standing squarely in a pile of tied for first place Pony droppings. Do not underestimate the Bolts Colorado. You have been warned.
Next: Oakland. Halloween. Five thousand seats to sell by Thursday at 1:15 p.m. Seeing how I don’t want to have an ear bitten off, or be stabbed by lunatic accountants from the Northern part of the state who play dress up like a pirate during football games, let’s buy some seats San Diego.
Seriously, can anyone explain the phenomenon of “Raider Nation?” How is it that you think if you dress like a pirate and cheer for your football team you are an intimidating force that frightens your opponents into producing involuntary grunt sculptures in their pants? Some advice, take your tired Pirate act down to Hillcrest after the game, and you will get a much different reaction. I am just saying, you know, Pirates? Hillcrest? Goes together like Sigfried and Roy, no?