Tuesday, October 19, 2004

Like You Don't Know What Gonorrhea Burns Like.

As a responsible quasi-journalist, I feel a certain responsibility, as I'm sure my esteemed colleague would agree, to clarify on vague opinions and statements that may appear on this post. That being said, I felt I should make it absolutely clear that my co-contributor is against the Chargers decisions regarding timeouts. I'm afraid I must agree. Many of the three and a half of you may accuse me of bandwagonning on this issue, but that is a chance I'm willing to take. I can no longer turn a blind eye to this problem. Truthfully, this is not a situation pertaining solely to the ever flagging Bolts organization. Many in the NFL have fallen victim to clock management controversy. Mike Martz and Bill Parcells come to mind, and it would be hard to call either of them slouches in the pantheon of NFL coaches. So, the question is, "How can proven winners like these men and our own Marty Schottenheimer, continue to engage in these egregious misjudgements week in and week out?" I know the answer. The fault lies not in the systems employed by these men and the teams they command, but in the system itself. This is why I intend to take my solution to the desk of Paul Tagliabue this very off-season.

Every team gets unlimited time outs!!! Could it be any simpler? No, it couldn't! Think about it. Games that stretch out to 6 or 7 hours. That should appeal to real football fans everywhere. No accountability for for the coaches in the late stages of the game. That should appeal to them. Plenty of extra rest for the players on the field. You know they're down with that plan. And, most importantly, even more commercials. That should appeal to the consumer in all of us, as well as adding much needed revenue to the dangerously diluted bank accounts of the owners, who would be sure to take that revenue right out and purchase brand new state of the art facilities for the teams we love, at no extra cost to you and me. Mr. Commisioner. This is an idea that's time has come!

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