Let me preface this post by saying there was no actual infanticide during the Monday Night Football game. We were in a bar, and the only way to get a baby inside would have been to sneak it in under our coat. What kind of person would sneak a baby into a bar just in case their team pisses them off and they need an extreme outlet for their anger? Maximum Colossus is no such monster. (You’ve got to spell it out for the masses, C. J. Collectively, they’re a bunch of idiots. Hey, they can’t read it if I put it in quotes, can they?)
I don’t really have much else to say that hasn’t been said. You can’t be too unhappy with a shutout against arguably your most hated rival, even if said rival looked like it had been hit by a bus. Aaron Brooks spent most of the game writhing around on the turf like Steve Buscemi hit him with the Buckwheats in the first quarter. That O-line got pretty big ups by the paid sports media during the preseason, what with Gallery going back to his college spot on the line. Come Monday morning that line, which from this point forward I will refer to as Linda for blowing like that, reminded me of Jennifer Love Hewitt’s jock boyfriend in Can’t Hardly Wait after he dumped her. I’m pretty sure one of those writers in there called Linda a fag.
On the flip side, the Chargers reminded me of J. Love’s breasts in I Know What You Did Last Summer. Awesome! Totally freakin’ awesome! I mean, sure, we’ll have to wait at least another week to see if our O-line can protect Philip Rivers for more than a handful of plays, but all in all, it looked good. I was also a little flustered that Marty decided not to test his young QB in the game, and instead hoard a 13 point lead against a team with some big play weapons. We don’t have much time to get him accustomed to the passing game before we go up against Baltimore, so it might be a good idea to take it out on the bad teams. Rivers looked great when he was allowed to throw, but those opportunities were just too few and far between for my tastes. Also, we may need Tomlinson later in the season. Solid ‘A’ effort, though, guys!
So, next Sunday we play the Titans. I’m not going to go too heavily into that right now, but I’m sure over the next couple of days, you’ll hear stuff like, “Oh, Kerry Collins, we can totally kick his ass,” and, “Titans, Schmitans, we will piss all over that poor excuse for a footballing club!” Go Bolts!!!
5 comments:
They can read it if you put it in quotes. But since you put it in parentheses, it's invisible to everyone except me. Shhhh... they might hear us...
Ummm... Here is a thought. Although probably stupid. The Chargers know they can beat bad teams on the ground so they choose not to pass. As a result, it doesn't give good teams like Baltimore a decent enough look at what the Chargers can do through the air when they prepare their game plan. HUH? What do you think?
I think that would be a great idea if the Chargers themselves knew what they could do in the air. At this point, however, I just can't see how they could truly know unless Marty dropped about 10 dollars in quarters down Zoltar's mouth at the county fair over the summer.
Agreed. It would have been nice to see the play action when the Raiders had all their guys up in the box stopping the run during the third quarter. Shottzie blamed it on field position. Not a terrible excuse, but it still sounds like farts from his butthole to me. But, 27-0 is 27-0. I would imagine it's more conservative than calculating for Baltimore...
I guess Marty could have at least let LT pass the ball.
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