Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Bowling for Pros...

MMM….Catholic School Girl Bartenders…..MMMM….oh… sorry.

That Archuletta story is a gem, for those of you who are not privileged enough to know the jersey wearing psychopath in the last post, you are missing out on a spectacular human being. There is not a word in my vocabulary that would describe the feeling that I would have if said jersey is to survive the 2004 Rams campaign. There is no description for what the devil the Goats are doing on the field this season.

Lots to talks about today and seeing that this is Thursday of this week, Santa was nice enough to give us Friday off, we might as well get some of this stuff that needs talking about off of our desks. Sounds good to me, here we go.

Pro Bowlers were handed their tickets to Honolulu today, and for the first time in what seems to be about two and a half decades four Chargers are representing the Blue and Gold Bolt Faithful out there in paradiso. Them Bolts being, Mr. One and Only Skipper Himself, my cohort’s man amongst boys Mr. First and Ten Antonio Gates, and the illustrious, infamous (that means more than famous) “Hoss” Tomlinson, and finally, last but not least, one of the twenty and sixteen tackle games, with a share of the team lead for pickoffs, Mr. Donnie Edwards Linebacker Extraordin…… wait,.. what? Wait,… WHAT?!!! Donnie done got snubbed…

Not possible. This is not possible, nor is it acceptable. It is in fact totally unacceptable. Not quite climb onstage and shoot the guitarist five times in the head for breaking up your favorite band unacceptable, but unacceptable nonetheless. This is just another one of those times in beautiful Bolt history where the media has raised their gloriously self righteous middle fingers right at our team and our town almost daring us to do something about it.

And yes they probably knew that just like last year this town would cry foul after certain players from San Diego are left sitting at the terminal with their best Jimmy Buffet shirts and leis around their necks waiting for that notice to board the plane.

Nine Eagles can go? Nine? Six Steelers? Oh my god, three Bengals are going. There are in fact three Cincinnati Bengals going to the Pro Bowl. Who is in charge here? What is going on? They will pass go, they will collect their leis and they will be in Honolulu, while Donnie is sitting at home watching on television. He can sit at home with his 136 tackles and 4 interceptions, one while high stepping all the way to paydirt. This makes bullshit smell like roses… I feel like someone tied me down with barbed wire, punched me in the throat and shocked me in the groin with a cattle prod. Unbelievable.

I am through venting about Pro Bowl snubs, that is something that will sort itself out on the field. Hopefully Donnie will use this as motivation this weekend against the older woManning, and force that enormous cranium to run for its life. Man, how did they ever find a helmet big enough to fit over that guy’s skull? Game time prep will be discussed tomorrow…

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