I Finally Checked My DVR! Go Chargers!

I’ve put off my evaluation of our beloved San Diego Chargers this week for a couple of reasons. First and foremost, I’ve been on jury duty and feeling sorry for myself for not being plugged into the interverse like I normally am, so I took it out on all of you. Or I let you all off the hook. It all depends on how you want to look at it. The other reason is because I have convinced myself I’ve been allowing Monday Night-God, it makes me so mad it was on Monday Night!-to sink in. I figured a little time would allow me to be objective. So, get ready to be objectified.

Let’s talk about something good that happened. Melvin Ingram stopped a Raider drive early in the game by forcing a fumble. Merrimanesque! I’m also going to go ahead and give Ingram credit for the Raiders designing a play where the tailback-maybe the fullback-throws the ball at Taiwan Jones’ face. Someone on our team should get credit for that, why not Ingram? Personal fact: My father spent a large portion of my lifetime doing business in Taiwan and I bet he’s kicking himself for not realizing you could actually name a person Taiwan. Think about it. Maximum Taiwan. It’s got a ring to it.

Another good thing is that Philip Rivers threw not a single Riverception, even though it felt like he would all night. It also felt like he wasn’t allowed to throw the ball very far Monday Night, which is why-and I refuse to look this up-he was something like 19 of 24 for 17 yards. “Safe but nearly effective” is better than bamboo shoots smothered in mayonnaise. That is a thing I was made to eat in Taiwan once, and it is as bland as any offensive play call I saw Monday Night.

A third not bad thing that happened is that our running backs didn’t do anything too overtly embarrassing. They kind of opted for a “seen not heard” thing, which is good, because they did not mess up a single one of our field goal attempts. Good on ya, offensive backfield.

And how about that kicker of ours? He kicked all the field goals and even several touchbacks, which are worth nearly as many points as field goals. Seriously, only three points less. My cohort claims that Kid Kaeding is on steroids and that is narrow minded. He could easily be on HGH or have had bionics or horse tendons implanted in his girlish frame.

The defense was impressive, applying pressure, making sacks and forcing Palmer to throw the ball away on many occasions. Some of you cynics might say that had the Raiders bothered to employ any professional pass catchers, those players-by sheer law of averages-may have been standing where some of Palmer’s errant throws went. To that I say, maybe. But how do you explain that play where the one Raider guy threw the ball at Taiwan Jones’ face?! Melvin Ingram. Who plays for? That’s right, the defense. Impressive.

So, that’s it. All good. No bad. The Raiders are probably as good as anybody in the league and we were able to leg them to death, because Norv Turner knows that when you have a team totally dominated like that, you don’t just go and show the rest of the league your touchdown plays.

I feel great about this team. Go Bolts!