Monday, January 22, 2007

Keep In Mind, I Don't Get Paid Squat.

Obviously, I know absolutely nothing about picking football games. I think I'm probably 0-10 against the spread, and 6-4 straight up. Not impressive. But as much as I am bad at guessing shit, I do know one thing. Bad postseason to be a Charger or ex-Charger. Seriously, aside from our own obvious implosion against the Patriots, look what happened to our old flames this weekend.

Reche Caldwell: Goes from looking like Jerry Rice against our Bolts a week ago to looking like...well...Reche Caldwell, against the Colts. Two ridiculously easy, important drops reminded everyone why this guy didn't make the cut on a team whose Wide Receivers looked fingerless last week. Also, why so surprised, Reche?


Or were you just breathing through your eyelids?



Drew Brees: Well, seeing that Brees went a long way in helping to resurrect New Orleans, the goodwill parade will march on even after this Sunday's performance. In truth, his numbers don't look terrible on paper, but if this team had ever been expected to be there in the first place, that grounding penalty resulting in a safety would have been considerd one of the uglier playoff moments in history. The Bears? Really?

And now all of you people who couldn't bear to root for the Patriots this weekend, be prepared to kneel at the altar of Peyton Manning for the rest of his sure to be annoying career. Just as Brett Favre undoubtedly careens toward the end of his career, Manning will be there to take up the mantle. A thousand sportswriters have had their, "Now that Manning has won a Superbowl, we can finally call him the greatest ever" article ready for years. They're two weeks away from hitting the enter key, and quite frankly I don't think the Bears have a chance in that game. That's okay by me, cause Chicago can suck it for thinking they're better than me, but I will miss being able to go all clutching the throat chokey-choke on Peyton. Of course, we all know that I have no talent for picking games, so maybe there's a chance after all. They're not saying "boo," they're saying "You suck, Manning!"

2 comments:

CJ said...

What a stupid way to end a stupid fucking football season. Obviously, no one in America wins after the game on February 4th.

I can't believe I'll be rooting for the Cubs. And quite wholeheartedly, I know for a fact I can't stomach the thought of all the Peyton propaganda that'll be force fed us post haste.

Unknown said...

The real story the sportswriters can't wait to orgasm over is the outcome of "Dungy vs. Smith."