Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Inability to Write Coherently Tragically Infects UT Writing Staff


This gem of a transcript from a Kevin Acee chat really ground my gears to a halt this morning. It's almost as if the UT is gone out and hired self serving Bolt fellating operatives in an attempt to rinse the disaster from the ranks of the Spanos Klan. It's rather infuriating.

Some 'What the Fuck?' excerpts:

"SouthPaw(Q) What is your personal opinion of Brandon Meriweather and do you think AJ Smith has any interest in him? I have him rated higher than Reggie Nelson.

Kevin Acee(A) i think most would have him rated higher than nelson if it weren't for off-the-field stuff. i don't think AJ goes there -- but a lot of times AJ takes a flier on character or injuries(Merriman, Cromartie) and it works out."


Uh, Merriman was busted however unfairly for steroids last season. Casting an enormous shadow of doubt over our 'character' combined with the multiple arrests by other personnel. Quite frankly, doesn't seem like A.J. really cares about character, let's not pretend he does okay Kevin.

Bolt_Power23(Q) The are some veterens still out there in free agency. Any chance the chargers bring in Eric Moulds or Al Wilson?

Kevin Acee(A) there is a reason those guys are still out there.


And that reason is what Kev? Insight, that's why I subscribe to the free internet feed.

Vegas_Bolt_Fan(Q) Asses the receivers. I think Jackson, Floyd, & Parker can get the job done. Will A.J. draft a WR?

Kevin Acee(A) They can get the job done -- they did in the second half of '06. also, remember that Antonio Gates is on this team. but they will draft a receiver in one of the first two rounds.


kelceyagraves(Q) i hope we throw 2 lt more this yr

Kevin Acee(A) throw to him more? how? are there going to be five quarters in games now?


Uh, no, there's not five quarters in games. And I think the answer is, "Throw to him more." Perhaps more touches in the second half of the New England playoff game? Any more of this and I'm going to fire this guy myself.

It's prediction time! Ludicrous prediction time!

MadForPlaid(Q) Kevin, give us your prediction on the Chargers' record (including playoffs if you believe we will make them again)!

Kevin Acee(A) 11-5


Wait...

kelceyagraves(Q) vegas has tha chargers at 5 ta 1 odds ta win tha superbowl----what do u think r tha chargers odds?

Kevin Acee(A) i'd never give 5 to 1 on a SB win. but 10 to 1. OK.


Wait...

czar(Q) care to predict how far we go in the playoffs?

Kevin Acee(A) too many variables. but i won't wuss out. super bowl. loss to cowboys.


Loss to the Cowgirls in the Super Bowl? Didn't he just say he'd take 10:1 on the Bolts, even though they're 5:1? Currently the Cowgirls are 15:1. He's a gambler that Kevin.

fred(Q) How the hell did we lose that playoff game against New England? What do you think is the number one reason?

Kevin Acee(A) the more i think about it: marty.


Mr. Acee, Mr. Smith and Spanos thank you for your work. Your bonus check is upstairs in their office, you are free to pick it up at any time. Please continue the fine work and don't forget your kneepads as Mr. Spanos' man part has been largely ignored by your staff of late. Thanks for your dedicated service.

Read the whole thing, there is loads of insight like, "That's what people I really respect told me." And all kinds of speculative work that is just genius.

Thanks for the laughs UT. You make this unpaid work fun.

1 comment:

Stuart said...

damn. can I get the Bolts at 10-1 to win the Bowl??? i'm gonna go mortgage my house.