I've been dreading this post for days. That whole, "If you don't have something nice to say, blah blah bullshit" and whatnot, but I think I've figured out a way to sidestep that. Here we go:
Our boy Peyton is gonna light up that weak-ass San Diego secondary! Woo, fuck yeah! The only thing he has to worry about is with that handsy bitch Jammer on the bench this week, we'll being seeing a lot of that wheelsy Cromertie kid. 109 yard field goal(?) return? More like 109.99999 yards. No problem there, though, really, cause that douche bag Florence'll keep any drive from stalling with a strategically thrown head butt on the other side. Seriously bro, do all your opponents put money in a hat and send it to you before the season starts? What's your playoff rate? And don't get me started on this rookie white Safety bullshit even if he is the best you got and probably would just go ahead and drop the interception in the first place and forego the whole, should I run with it, how much time is on the clock, where's Troy Brown bullshit. John Lynch can jump on a pile with the best of them and Archuleta is collecting ridiculous money for doing reverse sit-ups on the bench. Yeah, white Safeties make Peyton all kinds of jittery.
Even if our boy Peyton the Manning were to go spontaneously blind before kick-off, no matter. did you see what the rook did to that busted San Diego D last week? 296 mothuh-fuckin' yards! That ain't no joke. Joseph Addai has a raging clue right now, if you know what I mean.
On the other side of the ball, please. They used to give us fits, but I think if we crowd the middle on first down we can contain LT for the day. That leaves the game in the hands of rookie QB, Philip Rivers. What? Not a rookie, you say? Get the fuck out of here! Bwahahahahahaha! Bob Sanders is drowning in tears of joy!
Seriously, though, their punter is tits. Colts 49, Dolts 13. Go Colts!!!
Pin that to the locker room wall.