Ahhh Baseball...

Bums. I hate those Bums.

Took a stroll to the old Petco last night, meandered through the concourses, past the agonizingly long beer lines, down to the unobstructed front row behind the bag numbering three and had a nice comfortable seat to watch another Padre masterpiece unfold. Unfortunately for me, I was surrounded by not Padre Blue, but Bum blue and I was subjected to their idiocy all the night long. I got to hear the sweet sounds of “Sweep” all night from a certain fan, of which I am sure really had no idea what was going on. You don’t sweep someone on the first night of the series as far as I can remember. But, no one ever accused Dodger fans of being Mensa members in disguise.

I knew I was in for a long night when the bevvie line I picked was moving twice as slow as the one directly to my left. The guy standing next to me in that line not only made it to the front twice as fast as I did, bought not one but two beers, made his way back to his seat, consumed said beers, made nice with one of the Bum’s wives, then got back in line and nearly beat me to the front of it again. Meanwhile I am staring down two Sony t.v.’s watching what is fast becoming routine for the squad. Lots of baserunners, lots of potential runs, lots of going home without any action. It felt like high school all over again.

Good thing that we chose the old camo uni’s last night, wouldn’t want anyone to see the baserunners out there being left for dead. In those cammies, you could barely see the 10 guys we left on base. They blended in so nicely with the dirt and grass, it’s like they were hiding out there.

Woody pitched well. Very well. Walked a bit too many for my liking but it didn’t come back to hurt him. Then, in the most opportune of times, in the tenth we decided to start kicking the ball around. Good timing being extra innings and all. It’s not like you can go out and throw the ball into left field and expect it not to hurt you when the two best hitters on the team are coming to the plate. Oh, and that Milton Bradley guy, if he tells the crowd to shhh one more time with that fat finger up to his lips I might start throwing batteries at his goddamned head. Sorry. I lost it for a minute…

Hey, at least we get to see more of the same tonight. So it’s time for what I want to introduce as the old “Item ‘O’ the Day”, we’ll make predictions (for sport only, no gambling. Hint, Hint!) and see how accurate we can become… so off we go.

Over/Under on hits tonight: 7.5
Over/Under Left on Base: 9
Combined totals at the plate for the aforementioned “Murderer’s Row”: 3 for 12 with 1 walk.

Let’s see how good I am…