Picks Are For Posterity

Whatever the fuck posterity is. I'm going to start trying to post these picks earlier in the week going forward. I found it cut down on people laughing at me if I waited until the last minute to go on record, but since I won my pick 'em pool last week I'm the one who's laughing now. All the way to the bank. And by bank I mean strip club. And by laughing I mean stalking strippers. So here's this week's sure to be money winners.

Jacksonville @ Buffalo
I picked Buffalo to upset the Jets last week, because for some strange reason I have a soft spot in my heart for Buffalo. I just feel like that team never got any respect for owning the AFC for four straight years back in the day. Anyway, that soft spot hardened considerably last Sunday. Die, Buffalo. Jags 34, Bills 13

Denver @ Baltimore
For some reason I want to pick Denver here. Must be because Kyle Orton is my fantasy QB this week. Why am I being punished for Mike Vick's sins?!!! So, yeah. Fuck that noise. Denver 24, Baltimore 27

Atlanta @ Cleveland
One of these days Atlanta is going to be fully exposed. But not this weekend. Cleveland is better than I thought, but Cincinnati is as bad as I thought, so last week means nothing. I will start loving Cleveland if they break Jason Snelling's leg. Atlanta 31, Cleveland 21

KC @ Indy
I thought KC could challenge for the division, but their record is not a true representation of how good they are. Indy, however, is flailing. Not flailing enough. KC 30, Indy 34

Tampa Bay @ Cincinnati
Oh God, did i really pick Cincy to win this in my pool? Well, i guess I have to go with it. Tampa 13, Cincy 17

Green Bay @ Washington
Is it okay if I say that neither of these teams does anything for me? God, what a couple of fucking fucks these teams are. Green Bay 24, Washington 17

St. Louis @ Detroit
I'm gonna ride this Rams thing for a while. It just feels right. Rams 27, Detroit 26

Chicago @ Carolina
Chicago? Exposed. Chicago 13, Carolina 20

NY VaGiants @ Houston
Houston is another team i could not give a shit about. But they can be exciting. On the other hand, stupid name. VaGiants 27, Houston 34

New Orleans @ Arizona
New Orleans, it's about time to start looking like New Orleans. I feel bad for the Cardinals. I really liked that team last year. New Orleans 42, Arizona 10

San Diego @ Oakland
Is it okay to remind everybody that Oakland nearly handled us in Oakland last year with Jamarcus Russell at QB? Still, I'm in it now. Bolts 30, Oakland 27

Philly @ Frisco
Kolb looked good in his games before this season, so the ability is there. But man, does he look pedestrian so far this year. And Frisco has to win one eventually right? I mean, 0-16 is not going to win even that horrible division. Philly 17, Frisco 20

Minnesota @ NY Jets
No fucking idea. Randy Moss? No fucking idea! Vikings need this one, so i'll go with that, but I don't like it at all. Vikes 23, Jets 20

That's it. Enjoy your footballing. Go Bolts!!!