Friday, December 14, 2007

Not Much, But It's Somethin'

I’m sorry. I’m lazy this year. Much like the Chargers appear to be kind of blah about the season, I’m pretty blah about this blog. That doesn’t mean, though, that I’m not going to come here every so often and post some such bullshit or what-have-you every week, cause that’s totally my ninja way. Just like the Chargers ninja way seems to be to march a team out onto the field each week and be just good enough to give me hope that we may not spend the next few years squandering away our young, exciting talent even if they have already promised to give Norv Turner another year, whether I like it or not. Next season bodes very well for us. The good news is that the Patriots brought in no less than four big-time free agents before the season and AJ Smith has referred to the Patriots as an organization he tries to model us after. So while prior to this year, we shunned big-time free agents-much like the Patriots of years past-we might actually throw our hat into the ring for some huge and even not so historically “low-key” guys. Can you say Chad Johnson, anybody? It could happen. We’re going to be $30 million under the cap with all our best guys signed. The only money we’ll probably spend in house is some sort of monster contract extension for Cromartie, and I don’t think that’s going to piss anybody off. The bad news is that AJ will probably get into a bidding war with the league to bring The Burner back because he warms our bench so well, and given one more year I’m sure Norv can find a way to play him more. Just kidding, The Burner’s history. But say hello to Chad Johnson and whatever stud MLB is out there. You heard it here first.

“So what about this season?” I hear you saying. Well, this season is looking like a resounding success, of course. Not really, but after Denver all but threw away any hope of snatching the division from us last night (despite us doing everything in our power to help them along, except the 41-3 throttling, I fucking know, leave me alone!) I have to like our chances of making the post season. Also, it could be said that we have a fairly easy road to 11-5 at this point. Detroit, Denver and @ Oakland. All bad teams. We tend to own the bad ones. If that were to happen, there is a very good chance we could unseat Pitt and get to face either Buffalo or Cleveland instead of Jaxonville. In that scenario, I find it very likely we could win our first playoff game since 1994, a feat the Marty Schottenheimer could never achieve!!! A resounding fucking success, bitches!!! Choke on it and hail AJ!!!

I’m not as excited as the exclamation points would probably lead you to believe, but let’s face it, as much as I’ve bitched and moaned about bad playcalling, sophomore QB jitters, and pansy-ass defensive stratagem, I’d be losing my shit during a wildcard victory. But let’s never forget, we have to win ONE MORE GAME.

Which leads us to this week’s match-up against the Detroit Lions, or as I like to call them, the 2002 San Diego Chargers. Look it up, it’s uncanny. We’re decimated on defense this week. Castillo’s still out, and now Jamal Williams and Merriman are out. Check out what DR. Z from SI said about the hit that took Merriman out:

Shawne Merriman got a good hit on Vince Young and knocked him out of action for a while. Then Titans' tight end Ben Hartsock took a shot at Merriman, who limped off the field on a damaged left knee. Revenge hit, said the Chargers afterward. Jeff Fisher ordered it. Now I'm not taking sides in this issue, but if I were the prosecuting attorney, representing the plaintiff Chargers, I'd put Fisher on the stand, and my first question would be, "Now who was your coach again, when you played for the Bears?" "Buddy Ryan," he would say. "The prosecution rests it's case," I'd say.

That’s gold.

Our offense may be without Rivers, and while I myself may or may not have called for him to be benched on an occasion or two this season, Billy Volek looked like he was playing for the field last week and that’s more than a little worrisome. Still, I expect TBE to rack up about 150 yds and 3 TDs on his own this weekend, so I have a feeling we sew it up on Sunday.
Bolts 34, ’02 Bolts 28

Veronica Mars in gold bikini? Yummy. Too geeky? Fine, here's something more traditionally hot for you.

Lucy Pinder being all Christmasy. Go Bolts!!!

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