Ginormously vaGianty Friday Post.

Off to the East Coast to face the vaGiants. These East Coast trips rarely end well for us. Neither does playing against teams with winning records. Seriously, go back and look at the 14-2 year. The vast majority of those wins came against woeful bitches. But they say good teams beat the teams they're supposed to beat, and so far at least, we've done that. We just need to get to a point where the teams we are supposed to beat are pretty much every other team. We're probably not there yet, but I like us in New York for some reason. Maybe it's because they were kind enough to schedule us for a late afternoon game out there, so our guys aren't going to feel like they just got out of bed at kick-off. Seriously, could you imagine playing a game of football at 7:00 in the morgraa;hox,gf-huh! What? Sorry, I fell asleep on my keyboard just thinking about it. There just isn't that much coffee, greenies and meth in the universe. Maybe I like us because we've spent the last two weeks learning how to win, while the vaGiants have spent the last three weeks remembering that they suck (specifically Eli, who everybody wants to say has slipped because he's got planter's warts or some shit and not because he's gone through wild streaks of inconsistency throughout his entire NFL career). Mostly, though, I like us because Philip Rivers will be out there fighting for our honor. Look, I couldn't give a shit that Eli cried his way out of town (we got the better QB, as far as I'm concerned), but that fact remains that these two franchises are tied together by these two QBs and we Charger fans need this win to keep our sanity at this point, because the other guys already got their ring. Do you think Philip Rivers wants you to go insane? AJ, sure. Norv, undoubtedly. But Rivers? No effing way, man.

Gritty, if not wheelsy.

He's got too much to prove. I mean, did you know that people in New Orleans call Drew Brees, Breesus? That's fucked up.

Way too freaking likeable.

In light of my quick return to The Cut the other day, I've decided to add a new, possibly recurring featuring called Sign This. As in, you need to get down with whatever I'm talking about here. The inaugurral(?) subject of sign this will be the show Community. You should be watching this show. It's got Chevy Chase and the guy from The Soup on E! and it's pretty gloriously funny.

[Imagine clip here. I would have included one but NBC is stingey with their shit and their video player sucks balls.]

It's got a good premise and doesn't rely on any single camera or real life comedy gimmicks, it just brings the funny. The best part is you can watch it On Demand, which I do because it conflicts with Bones, which isn't as good as it used to be, but still features Emily Deschanel's boobs which I fully expect to see come out during an episode because all the porn I've downloaded over the years has screwed up my logical conclusion meter. I've had some awkward encounters with nurses and lady cops, let's just leave it at that.

Last note, I have started hearing other people that I don't even know using the term vaGiants. I'm pretty sure I made that up. I should've copywritten that shit, like "That's hot" or "Let's get ready to rumble." It's like the time Comedy Central stole the word ginormous from me and now everybody uses it and acts like I'm crazy when I tell them I made that word up and that they should give me a quarter. True fucking story! People will steal your shit, don't ever forget it.

Go Bolts!!