Tuesday, May 08, 2007

E...I...O...P...What? That's not right?

Dear Mr. Gold Glove Mike Cameron,

I took the liberty for Bud Black of scheduling you for an appointment with Dr. Kawisch for an annual eye exam and perhaps a laser screening to aid you with your seemingly obvious vision problems of late. It's now that I find out about the good Dr.'s demise, so I've resorted to my backup plan. There is a burned out building behind a '68 Torino just outside the main plaza in Tijuana, Mex. I have it on good authority that there is a man there that does wonders for American corneas with just an exacto knife and some super glue. He said that he could fix your ojos up just right, he'll have your sentido back to normal in no time. It will be slightly disruptive, but he promised a short extraordinarily unbearable pain filled recovery that will be incredibly discreet. Think about it Mr. Gold Glove Mike Cameron, I'll be waiting behind the Omni with the car running to get you there and back before curfew.

Best regards,


1 comment:

Blogust said...

I think Cameron strained his ojos by over reading his own press clippings.